Thursday Night - Protea Hotel in Gold Reef City Theme Park

Greetings! Hello from the Protea Hotel. It is a lovely hotel, full of Victorian charm. And the rooms? Of course they happen to be modern (see link to Protea Hotel and click on rooms). You might be thinking oh wow they've modernized. And they have, except for the fucking Internet. They cannot get that right whatsoever. So I'm tethering for the first time ever to my wonderful Nokia ESeries phone on the MTN network.

I saw wild peacocks today!!! And you might be thinking, "Hey Derrik, where are the pictures?" Well I have the pictures, and yet I forgot the cable that connects the camera to the computer. Yes, I am an idiot. No I couldn't remember everything. I also forgot business cards. Whatever, I'm not too stressed. This weekend I will get a card reader, and then you fine reader, will rue the day you asked that question! Muah hah hah.

Speaking of evil laugh, did you check this out yet? Deserves it, the douche. Seriously, that you can be so disrespectful of privacy is ridiculous. Of course, maybe I'm the idiot for posting the blogs and putting them on Facebook.

I hope you like the links this time. I figured I should do something snazzy.

OMG if I have to see one more insurance commercial asking you to text to obtain policy, well then I'm going to scream. Actually the television I've figured out is 10 channels. Here they are (I know you didn't ask, but tough)

- 1. SABC 1 - consists of kids programs, news and really awful music videos.
- 2. SABC 2 - Zulu news, Zulu Soap Operas, Afrikaans News, and other assorted shit
- 3. SABC 3 - my favorite channel so far - consisting of American shows, albeit 5 - 24 months old. Also? Afrikaans Soap Operas. Holy hell those are awful, even with the English subtitles.
- 4. Some random crap on Channel 4. Haven't paid too much attention to it.
- 5. Channel M - More American stuff, my second favorite channel. But Justin Beiber is on. Ack!
- 6. MM1 - Awful American movies. For instance right now, "Elegy" is on. Wait that got a decent review. Hmmmm.
- 7. MM2 - More American movies, less awful. "Primal Fear" is on right now. Hey, it's hope.
- 8. CNN International. Which isn't bad and the woman that's on right now is saucy.
- 9. S2 - Sports! But it's Cricket 20/20. I can't understand this game at all. Hit the ball, it can go anywhere and then you run back and forth. Wheeeeee!!!!!!! South Africa is winning 96-5. Is that possible??!
- 10. S3 (I don't know what happened to S1) - Soccer. No, not just sports, it's every damn soccer game imaginable. Which? Now I understand why it's the World's game. I was watching Austria-Serbia last night and the crowd started throwing flares into the stands and onto the field. And the goalkeeper removed them. Can you imagine if that happened in the States?

Well, dear reader, I could go on and on. Like how I'm learning Afrikaans one word at a time (Goeiemorie - Gooey More-eh which means good morning). I think I'll start that with you next time. See how that goes. I could also talk about how I went to the casino tonight and won R1000 and then lost it, so I wound up evil. Or the fact that Vanilla Ice is doing commercials here for Castle Ice Beer. Or the fact that everything is backwards here. For instance, instead of pulling on a door to enter a room, you push on it. I've felt like a dumbass so many times already. Also? people pass on the left in a hallway. Just like driving on the road.

But more later! As always feedback and questions are welcome.